Ann's Residency

21 December

We arrive in the heat and humidity of Cochin about 10.30 in the evening. As we walk out from Customs we spot our driver straight away with his BOON placard. It's a long dark journey for almost 2 hours to Ann's Residency through the chaos of central Cochin where a Metro Rail is being built, to the historic area of Fort Kochi. We enter a dark quiet courtyard and are taken straight to our room.

22 December
Comfy bed with very tight fitting mosquito net not so easy to escape from. Ann's Residency is an oasis of calm with beautiful tropical gardens: little ponds with water lilies, orchids, lots of birds. Lovely cool hall and landing, and great open breakfast room in the garden.

We meet Ann as we come down for breakfast and learn that her husband, Leslie, whom I've had all my email dealings with, died 2 months ago, and she now runs the hotel. She's a lovely smiling woman, quiet and calm. We learn she lost her husband only 2 months ago and there's a little shrine to him in the hall.

The house itself is Dutch built and it's near the top of the peninsular in the heart of Fort Kochi, near all the attractions so we can walk everywhere. We have a good breakfast of fruit, eggs and toast and tried Masala tea for the first time, chatting over loud birdsong. We plan to walk around the headland, starting with the Chinese Fishing nets, probably the most famous landmark.


The Chinese Fishing nets may in fact have been built by the Portuguese, and are still in use today being a main tourist attraction. Across the channel is Ernakulam the main town and shopping area

The walkway around the headland is crowded with little stalls selling stuff for tourists. The litter washed up on the beach is a bit of a shock, with jackdaws rifling through it in search of food



It was pretty clear from the start that we're a bit of a tourist attraction ourselves. The Indian tourists all wanted to chat and have their photos taken with us. We become celebrities by virtue of being tall and white I guess

Kochi is hosting an Art Biennale at the moment so we went to the main show at Aspinwall. There's some really interesting art on show and a great little café where we sat eating wadas with sambal, drinking watermelon juice, and gazing across the water.


 

 

I was specially keen on this collection which was housed in an old chemistry lab. Masses of small clay items on shelving , but also some huge pieces which must have been built in situ, like huge alien creatures made of clay and straw

Walking around Kochi isn't so easy, partly because of the heat and humidity but also because the roads are so busy with bikes, tuc tucs, and scooters coming at you from all directions. Just crossing the road is pretty scary and the pavements, where there are pavements, are broken and uneven.

We make our way to Princess Street to get a SIM for my mobile, which turns out to be a bit of a mission. In India one has to fill in two sides of an A4 sheet and supply a passport photo in order to buy a SIM card! So we are directed to a photographer's studio in order to get my picture taken. The whole process takes time but costs next to nothing. We have a good lunch in (for India) a fairly swanky hotel restaurant. Eating out is so very cheap here, and mostly vegetarian. Most places don't serve alcohol either. Salt lassi seems essential in this heat, and goes well with all the curries.

Katy, Max, Bill, Craig and Rachel are all arriving at about 5.30 this afternoon and our driver comes to collect us at around 3 in order to get there on time. He's a sweet little chap called Venu whose English is not that great and the car turns out to be a 15 seater bus with very little leg room. The trip back to the airport takes even longer and we arrive a little late worried that they've already landed, taken the initiative, and found their own way to Ann's Residency. No option but to wait for the next flight from New Delhi and it's a great relief when we see them come through the doors. Nearly 3 hours driving back again and no-one's eaten so it's straight out to Oceanos the nearest restaurant.

23 December
Ann changed sterling to rupees for us all, different plans are discussed and we break into 3 groups, Katy, Craig and I going to Ernakulam to shop for fabric, Max, Rachel and Bill to come with us but do their own thing once over the channel, Mike's off to the Folklore Museum.

Our first morning together sitting out the front at Ann's

The local ferry cost all of INR4 each (about 4p for a 20 minute trip). We queue separately for tickets, men and women, with the locals and there's just one seat left for me. I do love a boat trip. On the other side local lads are keen to take our photos. Max is on a mission to get us to the Rick Stein restaurant he's read about. The hardest bit is getting across the road. Rachel takes the lead, we hold hands and run for it.

. . . and it's the real McCoy, with rice, curry sauce and chutneys dolloped onto banana leaves while Max goes off to choose the fish. Eating with fingers (right hand only of course) because, as everyone knows, you use your left hand to wipe your bum

We get a tuc tuc to a main shopping area where Katy buys a saree.This kind Muslim lady takes us up to a little room to show us how to put it on. The little top worn under the saree is supplied as material. Katy had this made up for INR1.50, so in total it comes to about £7.50

Mike has an exciting tuc tuc ride to the Folklore Museum which is stuffed full of treasures

That evening we plan a trip to see the famous Kathakali Theatre. We're advised to go for the full 2 hours, the first of which is watching make-up being applied. The show itself is very good, ending with 2 young men displaying fighting techniques with great strength and prowess.

The dance/drama is accompanied by singing and drums. The costumes are fantastic

Boon boys with their new friend

After the show we go on a long hot search for beer and food. End up in a bad tourist place and I give up and tuc tuc home. The others end up back at the same place as last night. A long tiring day but lots of action.

 

Villa Akasa

24 December
Christmas Eve. We plan to be on the bus by 9.30 and are only a little late after settling up with Ann and Jenny, our transport organiser. All pile in and Venu sets off across to the city from Fort Kochi, then heads south to Verkala. The journey takes about 5 hours through crazy Indian traffic, thousands of scooters, bikes, tuc tucs and cars, with the occasional elephant. Some of the scooters have whole families, Mum, Dad with two little kids and not a crash helmet between them. We have no seat belts, it's none too comfortable but chatting, laughing, and dozing, we pass the time. We take a couple of wee stops in tiny street cafes where the locals are friendly but obviously curious about us. We must be an unusual sight for them.

Eventually Venu gets us to Varkala and finds a restaurant for lunch, then it's not too far to Villa Akasa. Here Venu leaves us and goes home for Christmas with his family. There are two buildings, one has two large bedrooms both with en suites and the other houses Shama, the kitchen and staff, with a large double room and en suite above. I'd imagined there'd be a shared area for Bill to kip in but they find him a small room  on the ground floor. The rooms are gorgeous as are Premolt and Raveej, the two young men who provide us with breakfast every morning, and help us with local info. Premolt's English is excellent, Raveej's quite shy but is very proud of the bread he bakes for us each morning.

Villa Akasa, the main building, we have the top floor with balcony. There are so many birds flying around here, the bird song is really loud. Kites fly overhead and what we think are huge ospreys. There are lots of noisy jackdaws, a very friendly one sits on our balcony rail each morning, and we see the odd parrot flying by.

Many homes have built nativity scenes outside which are beautifully lit up with fairy lights every night. The villagers are so friendly here, all wish us 'Merry Christmas' as we walk past

So this is our street heading down to the beach, with the wall of our villa on the right. There are a few small dwellings down the road and lots of kids playing. There's no rubbish collection in most of Kerala so there are lots of small fires smouldering away everywhere, which creates a hazy atmosphere



Our street going in the other direction towards the main road. There are preparations for a wedding nearby, hence the huge cooking pots on the left. Note the 3 wheeler tuc tuc on the road. Our preferred method of transport.

So on Christmas Eve evening we all go for a short walk down our little lane past the Mosque and an ancient Hindu Temple to Varkala South Beach. A lot of the people here are Christian; Kerala is known for its religious tolerance and all religions seem to live side by side in harmony here.

It's getting dark, we paddle in the warm sea, the waves are big there's a strong undertow. Crabs are scuttling around and bats fly overhead. Later we go out to the nearest restaurant, Green Pepper, which sells the inevitable Kingfisher beer. We wait ages for the food to come, listening to live Indian music.

Live music at Green Pepper on Christmas Eve

25 December
Christmas morning. I wake early, sit and write on our balcony in a hazy light with birds flying noisily all around me. After the bustle of Fort Kochi I feel I can relax at last. The gardens here are very green and lush with bougainvillia, hibiscus, morning glory, orchids, and a fishpond, complete with water lilies and floating red hibiscus, replaced fresh every morning by Raveej.

Christmas morning on Katy and Craig's patio where tables and chairs have been set up for us all. Charming Premolt serves the most beautiful fruit salads I ever seen, along with eggs, rotis, pararthas, toast, honey and pineapple jam, and a variety of teas. Marsala has become the favourite.

 

We plan to head off up to North Beach and Varkala Beach village. We walk through the lanes using the map provided and find our way down to the south end of the beach where we stop at Theerams restaurant to book it for dinner tonight.

The beach is packed with people enjoying the holiday. On this, the southern end of the beach, the local women splash around in the water fully dressed. Further up, beneath the cliff top village, the tourists sunbathe in bikinis

 

Looking down from Varkala village which sits on top of the cliffs at the northern end of the beach

 

There are loads of boats shooting back and forth, giving rides and driving right up over the surf onto the beach itself, tooting horns. The boats are sleek and fast, the men standing up in them hollering with bravado and showing off to eachother

We walk up the beach and swim at the top end. The waves are huge and a bit scary, most people just play in the shallows. Varkala Village itself is up the steps on top of the red cliffs and we have lunch there at Café del Mar. There's a lane on the edge of the cliff, lined with tourist shops, and backed by little lanes full of backpacker places, yoga schools, and more small shops and cafes. We're glad we're staying in the calm and quiet of Villa Akasa. We look round a few shops, then try to find our way home through the lanes, end up getting tuc tucs.

Early Christmas evening and Premolt brings round some Christmas cake for us to eat with our two precious bottles of fizz. Katy looking the part in her saree

Looking at the menu at Theerams, prettily lit up with lanterns. Wonderful to be eating in this warm tropical heat with the beach below us and waves pounding. Vegetable and fish curries, dahls, parathas and fish baked in banana leaf are favourites. With Kingfisher beer of course. Many restaurants just don't serve alcohol at all and it's not sold in the shops, only at Government booze shops where you have to queue for it. So this is the driest holiday we've ever had.

26 December
A slightly cooler soft grey morning. Walk down the lane to South Beach for a swim past the Mosque and the Temple.

Apparently the temple is 2,000 years old, a very tall thin Indian lives there and takes care of it. There are lots of jackdaws flying about eating the offerings left by worshippers

To have a proper swim we have to get past the huge waves to the calmer water beyond. Mike gets caught by a couple of big ones and is thrown about like a rag doll. Pretty scary. We'll be playing in the shallows from now on I think.

The fishermens' boats are long, thin and brightly coloured. Unfortunately the men use the beach as a toilet every morning and you can see them crouching as you walk past. Guess we shouldn't act superior about this but as Westerners we can't help but struggle with it. Mike's just full of admiration for the regularity

 

Back for breakfast and we plan to go into Varkala town, do a bit of shopping and meet up for Masala Dosas at Premolt's recommended café. It's a dirty, dusty trail in, past smouldering piles of rubbish with loads of traffic alongside us. We're looking for fabric and Mike buys some vibrant purple silk and orange linen which he's hoping to get made into pyjamas. I buy lots of the pretty stars we've seen hanging up everywhere for Christmas. We find a tailor who'll make up pyjamas by tomorrow night.

 

In the evening we walk down to our beach again and find it's quite crowded. There are lots of locals playing in the water, jumping the waves

A lovely group of lads wanting to have their photo taken with us, such happy smiling kids, a bit cheeky and full of fun

Later on we walk to Green Pepper to meet the kids who are there watching the sun set and drinking kingfisher. The restaurant has a great setting, on the edge of the cliff right over the sea in between north and south beach. By the time we arrive it's dark and we watch the twinkling lights of the fishing boats out to sea. Then we all pile into three tuc tucs and race to the Helipad at Varkala Beach.

This is the most exciting/mad/scary trip you can imagine. Our driver is quite old and doesn't smile but he's really up for the race. Katy and Craig's driver is young and they offer him a bonus if they get there first. So we're overtaking and being overtaken going round bends up and down hills and on blind corners. I just love it, except that Katy and Craig win because their chap takes them right to the restaurant door whereas our's drops us at the Helipad. Our restaurant tonight is 'God's Own Country Kitchen'. We have a terrific waiter and are served huge quantities of fish. Dinner takes an age to arrive so we play cards while waiting. All pile into a large taxi to return home.

27 December
Sunny morning stroll down to the beach and we wander up to the far end under the red cliffs, then watch the fishermen perform their early morning fishing routine.

Varkala is famous for its red cliffs which tower above the beach. Not sure if anyone lives in the houses at the top



The egrets are common as seagulls here, we watch them catching fish on the incoming tide

We watch about 30 fishermen hauling in their huge net. The whole process takes about 2 hours and we catch it towards the end of the procedure when the net is closer to shore and some of them are splashing the water to scare the fish towards the end of the net

We bump into Katy and Craig on their early morning constitutional

It's a hot day and after breakfast we walk to Varkala Beach, drinks at Theerams, then splash around in the sea with the locals. Big waves in the Arabian Sea, really too scary to get past for a proper swim. We walk up the steps for lunch at Little Tibet where they serve momos, steamed dumplings. Hello to the Queen' on the menu but they don't have it so I'm disappointed again.


The road is decorated for the wedding. I'm using the brolly and fan system: keeping the sun off and me a bit cooler

In the afternoon we have our yoga lesson which is a bit odd. The chap obviously knows his stuff but is going too fast for those who've not done yoga before, All a bit too regimented, we're also getting bitten to death by mosquitos so not that easy to relax.

Tonight we eat a good meal cooked and served to us at home out on the patio by Premolt, then wander down the road to see what's happening for the wedding.

So the house is all lit up like a Christmas tree. We stop to take photos and are approached and invited inside. Our hosts are insistent we go in to meet the bride and everyone

Once inside we're met by a group of women and girls, all gloriously attired for the occasion

 

The bride looking splendid in all her glory

. . . and here we are becoming part of the wedding celebrations, being videoed meeting the bride



. . . then taken through to the dining area where a meal is served to us despite protestations that we've just eaten

The whole experience is just wonderful. We're treated like honoured guests, yet we don't know a soul there. The bride's uncle takes a special interest in Mike. I get away with eating a couple of little bananas and a gooey sweet but everyone else has a second dinner.

Alleppey

28 December
Venu is driving us to Alleppey this morning after breakfast, so we pack up, get ourselves sorted, and say goodbye to our hosts. Villa Akasa has been a terrific stop for us.

Premolt takes a last photo of us in the garden before we say goodbye

We set off back up the long dusty road north, through all the heavy, mad-driving Indian traffic. There's a pilgrimage going on with hundreds of people walking single file on the roadside heading south, all dressed in bright yellow. Next stop is the Colonel where we're only booked for one night but I've had a lot of email contact and am keen to meet him at last. The journey takes about 3-4 hours but Varick Villas are quite hard to find, tucked away close to the Backwaters region.

When we finally get there we're all starving and the Colonel (who insists more informally, on being called Nair) instructs Venu where to take us for lunch, and how to get us to the other venues he's lined up for us. There's nothing within walking distance unfortunately. The Colonel's a tiny man with a delightful wife, a charming smile and yes, he's got a moustache. It becomes clear that he's keen for us to eat in only the best hotel restaurants, where buffet lunches are the order of the day. This isn't what we're used to and the thought of buffet food that's been sitting round being kept warm for God knows how long, doesn't really appeal but we dutifully follow the Colonel's plan. The family that eats warm curry together . . .

After lunch poor Venu hunts down the elephant place which is tucked away down tiny lanes. Not sure how he manages to get our bus down all these tiny streets but he finds it in the end.


So here we are looking a little nervous on top of a female 43 year old Asian elephant. Not the most comfortable ride because we're perched on top of its shoulders and consequently wobble from side to side as it plods along, our legs wide akimbo, feeling pretty unsafe with only a metal rod to hang on to.

The pink patches look a bit sore but are apparently common on Asian elephants, a bit like freckles on humans. The steps help us climb onto the elephant, minding the gap of course.

Our next stop is the beach at Alleppey, which is just crowded with people. It's the Sunday between Christmas and New Year and the whole world is out there enjoying the holiday atmosphere on the beach. We couldn't work out what was happening at first because we could just see a massive line of people on the shoreline and wondered what was going on. Literally thousands of Indians watching the waves, kids playing, families chatting, all out for a good time.



My one regret from the holiday is that I didn't go on a camel ride: elephant and camel in one day would have been quite something, but we'd arranged to meet Venu at 6pm and just run out of time

So everyone is just watching the waves crashing on the shoreline, with people splashing about enjoying the holiday. Spot Mike in the crowd. There are vendors selling battered chillies, balloons, noisy whistles, all sorts of stuff. The battered chillies are good

 


 

We head back to the Villa to rest, then off again in the bus for dinner. Venu's been instructed to take us to another posh hotel and is driving back towards the beach again through loads of holiday traffic. In fact, the food's pretty good, it's hot and we sit outside by the pool. Eat as much as you like for INR200, about £2!

29 December
The Colonel's taking us for an early morning constitutional through the rice fields at 6.15. It's definitely the best time to walk, being cooler, and there's a lovely mist in the air.

We walk along these little paths with draining ditches both sides and rice fields stretching as far as we could see. There are islands of trees here and there which are where the farmers' houses are hidden



We see loads of birds: crow pheasant, egrets, herons, a painted stork, bitterns, kingfishers, and some that are completely new to us like the drongo with its distinctive swallow tail. The birds are after the tiny fish and frogs that live in the wet fields

. . . and here I am with the Colonel. He's a very interesting man full of information about Indian people and politics, it's army, and its future. He's also keen to hear about our lives in New Zealand and the UK

We head back for a good breakfast of fruit, appams with vegetable curry, and home baked banana and walnut bread

After breakfast we're all packed up and the Colonel directs Venu to take us to the nearest bank so we can change money to pay for our houseboat trip. Everything takes time in India and a visit to the bank is no exception, so we're a bit late arriving at the houseboat destination, in fact Venu isn't sure of the venue so ends up phoning the owner and we're eventually escorted by two men on a scooter to the place where the boat is docked.

You can't help being impressed by these glorious old barges with their wonderful wicker sides and roofs. They come in all sizes and ours, being 4-bedroomed, is one of the largest with a two floors. Spending a night or two on one of these, which includes board and lodging, has become a main tourist attraction for the area and there are dozens of them floating serenely down the waterways of the Alleppey Backwaters. It's also a big money earner for the owners and we're initially shocked that once on board we receive a phone call demanding our outstanding payment be handed over before the boat sails.

We're soon floating down the main channel in a bit of a barge jam, relaxing, reading and checking out the other boats

Relaxing on the top deck



. . . and it really is very relaxing: there's nothing to do but read, chat and watch the boats go by



We eventually reach a large open lagoon area where the barges thin out a bit, we find time for a spot of yoga before lunch

 

We stop for lunch and the food is very good: fish, rice, curries and chutneys and breads

 

The trip is a very relaxing calming experience. The crew are quiet and keep to themselves. The boat is rather grubby in fact, but each double bedroom has an en suite and it's relatively cool as there's a breeze when the boat's moving and air con is turned on at night when we dock.

The most action we see is when Craig's hat gets blown onto the roof. Lovely tummies!

We dock twice before stopping for the night, once for beer and once to buy fish for dinner. Not sure what Craig's up to here.

We have a great dinner including the huge snapper we've just bought. I'm very keen on the pineapple chutney and the vegetable dishes they serve. We play cards and watch the geckos running around after eating. The mosquitos are more of a pest at night. We watch huge fruit bats and smaller ones, flitting around the boat.

30 December
It's a rather lovely soft, misty morning, we even get a little rain. The water seems heavy and grey, and clumps of water hyacinth have floated into the channel.



Friendly jackdaw comes to visit, probably after our breakfast

After a short journey we're waiting for Venu to arrive at the docking site beside an ugly Ramada Hotel. Our boat has forced it's way in to dock in prime position at the landing site. Interestingly, this means that people arriving in other boats have to make their way through our boat to get onto dry land, so we have a stream of total strangers clambering past us.

 

 

 

New Year in Fort Kochi

30 December
Once we've found Venu and his bus it's a relatively short journey back to Fort Kochi and we're safely back at Ann's by 10.30.

So we give our trusty Venu a good tip and say goodbye. Not sure how we'd have managed without him.

Everyone goes off to see a group of school boys playing hockey across the road. They draw a crowd of hilarious, happy, cheeky and charming schoolboys

This time we're on the first floor at Ann's Residency, with a lovely terrace outside our door, where we plan to have drinks before going out on New Year's Eve.

We visit the Basilica before going for lunch at nearby Fusion Bay, a great Portuguese fusion restaurant

In the afternoon Mike goes off in search of the bike races on the beach which the school kids have told him about and I have a long sleep. We eat fantastic coconut prawns that evening in another recommended restaurant.

31 December
We set off early walking to the Jew Town area which is the other side of the peninsular. It's a misty, fairly cool morning having rained a lot in the night. We visit the Jain temple and wonder at the strange water channelling ceremony. Quite a long walk but we eventually find the Mattancherry Palace. Outside there's an elephant lying on its side being washed with a hosepipe. Immediately inside is a room where the walls are covered in the most exquisite, detailed murals, in rich reds, oranges, browns and blacks, telling stories of Hindu Gods. In later rooms there are a lot of rather tedious information boards but again at the end another room full of wonderful murals. No photos allowed and no post cards for sale unfortunately.


We find an upstairs café for coffee and at long last I have my 'Hello to the Queen'. It's sliced bananas caramelized in honey and sugar, served with a dollop of vanilla icecream. Quite delicious and worth the wait. Then we wander down the main street to the Jewish Synagogue, past all the hassling Kashmiri traders, and meet up with everyone, returning to Casa Maria's for lunch. 

We continue to wander round this area and come across this large Santa. More shopping then it's back home in tuc tucs

 

6.30pm we meet up on our terrace for our final bottle of champagne along with 3 cans of beer between us. It's a beautiful evening with bats and birds flying overhead. We're booked into the Old Courtyard restaurant which is on Princess St and fairly close, but it's a bit of a disappoint-ment after all the wonderful food we've been eating.

 

After dinner we head on down to the beach where thousands of people are gathering for the famous Santa burning ceremony. The focus is a 30ft high Santa made of papier mache or something similar, with beard, but dressed in brown rather than red, and inexplicably holding a cat on his arm. We're down on the beach, boys dancing with the locals to the Indian band, then we find a bar. Mike and I go back to Ann's for a breather, pushing our way through the crowds going in the other direction. When we return a couple of hours later, the crush is unbelievable, with people pushing their way through cars, bikes and scooters, mostly at a standstill. It's a benign crowd however and not at all threatening.



This picture's taken from the beach. There's an enclosure behind Santa where they've placed most of the foreigners which is where we meet the kids when we return to the action

There's a countdown and all hell breaks loose when, at the stroke of midnight, Santa is detonated rather than set alight. The crowd goes mad and fireworks start exploding immediately above, sending showers of embers down around us. It's complete mayhem, a health and safety nightmare, and a lot of fun. Needless to say it's even harder trying to fight our way home through the crowd.
 

1 January 2016
Our last day in India, as we're spending 2 days in Singapore to break our return journey, flying out late this evening. We meet up for lunch, Bill has a go on a Royal Enfield, then we move on down to see the New Year's Day Parade. It takes forever to get going and I give up and go back to rest. We've officially vacated our room so have to borrow Max and Rachel's to shower etc. Everyone gathers to say goodbye and off we go in a taxi, very very slowly, because roads are crowded with the parade happening. Luckily we've left ourselves plenty of time. It's been a brilliant holiday, exhausting at times, but wonderful.

Bill, Katy, and Craig have grabbed a good spot to watch the parade

Elephant being dressed up for the procession while he's patiently munching away on sugar cane